Silence Of The Ram

219
ghost

 

July 28,2014(ISN) – As far as I’m concerned, you can take your tweets and shove them up your Twitter hole. And while you’re at it, you can sit on my Facebook, one keyboard click or lick at a time. I pray for the day when all of your carelessly crafted characters breathlessly misspelling where you stopped for coffee, back up and gigabyte you in the ass.

If I had the technological wherewithal, I would travel to some Samsung galaxy far far away where I’d hack out the hearts of your hand-held devices just long enough for you to see the miserable screen sucking creatures you have become.

I’m talking to you, specifically, the dude that took his dad to a Father’s Day lunch in our local pub and immediately spent the first few minutes frantically searching the wall for a socket to recharge his phone. As my wife will attest, he then proceeded to check his phone every five minutes, even after their food had arrived, his dad simply staring off into cyber space, having abandoned any hope of conversation, other than the words they exchanged with their waitress. 

I’m also talking to you, the family of four and a half that shared the table next to me in Nando’s, only looking up from their phones long enough to pass around the baby, who was crying with an obvious early onset of I Phone envy.

I’m old enough to remember when people actually chatted, when phone companies ran ads on TV trumpeting long distance calls, “the next best thing to being there,” a time when the only thing you used your thumbs for was hitchhiking. We are rapidly devolving into a species of thumb-twitching texters and tweeters that can’t carry on a conversation for five minutes with the person they’re having dinner with without checking their hand-held devices.

We are living in an age where children sleep with their Smart Phones, where university graduates can’t string a couple of paragraphs together that actually embrace the rules of grammar, punctuation and spelling, an era where it’s more convenient to type than talk to the person next to you. And please, don’t get me started on penman, err, penpersonship?, and the lost art of writing a letter.

And so, I’m asking you to join me in embracing a day to be determined in September that will be declared technology-free Wednesday. It will have to be a Wednesday because there’s no NFL games scheduled on that day, and you still have all day Tuesday to e-mail your buddies to recap the Mondaynight game. Plus, there’s no urgent need to change your Yahoo Pro Football picks on Wednesday, as long as you remember to make your computer selections on Tuesday for the Packers/Seahawks game on Thursday night. That will still enable last minute changes on Thursday, providing you have access to the Internet, because 15 minutes before kickoff your Facebook buddy in Green Bay may send an urgent tweet to tell you Aaron Rodgers is doubtful after being involved in a fender bender on the way to the stadium. Yeah, I think technology-free Wednesday in September will work just fine, at least until hockey season starts for real in October.

ABOUT LEFT FIELD

I am a die-hard, dyed in the wool Habs and Broncos fan who still mourns the loss of the Montreal Expos. I will endeavour to try and be entertaining and objective in my musings and rants about the world of sports, celebrity, politics and the things that affect all of us, even when I’m bashing the Bruins, laughing at the Leafs, fileting the Flyers or stomping on the Steelers.

If what you read here makes you laugh, think out loud or gives you pause for thought, I’ll consider it a case of mission accomplished. If the content induces you to send an e-mail expressing how much you like or dislike me or my writing, fire away. I will do my best to acknowledge your comments and take your opinions to heart, mainly because the unusual anonymous nature of this posting provides me with an incredibly thick skin. Send your comments to leftfield@independentsportsnews.com. Find out about amazing advertising opportunities in Left Field at leftfield@independentsportsnews.com.

The content in this column are not necessarily the opinions, beliefs or comments of Independent Sports News, and should not be construed as such. Watch for Left Field twice a month in this space, a column by a semi-award winning journalist whose work has appeared in major publications and community newspapers in British Columbia for the past 22 years.

Your sports. Your teams. The ISN Daily Digest.

Sign up to the ISN Daily Digest and sit back while we pick the previous day’s best headlines and speed them straight to your inbox every morning.
Email address
First Name*
We abide by all applicable emailing laws including 100% CAN-SPAM/CASL/US CAN-SPAM Act compliance. No spam!